I have heard others refer to our marriage as a fairytale marriage.
I am a lover of fairytales. Cinderella has always been my favorite. I still tear up when I watch her dancing with Prince Charming at the ball. Sigh. When I met her at Disney World I had to have my photo taken with her just like the girls did. Shoot, I’ve had my photo taken with her when the kids weren’t with me.
Do I believe in fairytales? Somewhat.
Is our marriage a fairytale? It may look like it from the outside.
The truth? No one in this world can push my buttons the way Chris Barnes can.
Do we fuss? Yes.
Do we argue? Yes.
Do we see eye to eye on everything? Absolutely not.
As sweet and kind as most everyone thinks I am (insert wink here), the truth is I can be a bear to live with sometimes. I know this. I’m grumpy sometimes. I’m a little bit of a control freak. I like things orderly although they seldom are in our house. This gets me out of sorts.
Chris for all the good that his is, also has some faults. Shocking I know!
When the stress of everyday life gets to us, we may lash out at the other. That’s not what we should do. We both know that, but sometimes it happens.
Marriage isn’t easy. I don’t care what anyone says. Marriage is work. Every single day it is work.
No matter how upset or angry we may get at the other, one thing you won’t hear either of us do is speak disrespectfully of each other. We don’t degrade the other in front of our children or anyone else. This is a major pet peeve of both of ours. It is so sad to me to hear children repeat things about one of their parents that they have obviously heard the other parent say. And to hear a husband or wife badmouthing the other in public with no regard to who may hear is so disappointing to me.
On November 27, 1993, I made a vow to Chris Barnes. That day I also made a vow to God. It was that I would remain faithful to my husband in the good days and the bad. Nothing in our vows said it would always be easy. Just the opposite. We acknowledged that there would be bad times.
So when we have a disagreement…when it escalates into an argument, I know that we will get past it. That we will work it work it out. That things will be ok. I know this because I know Chris took his vow to me just as seriously as I did. I’m thankful for this man that loves me despite my faults.
This year we will celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary. If I could give advice to a young couple today, it would be to always respect each other and that any marriage that is truly to be blessed is one that is a marriage of three – husband, wife and God. If you are truly committed to both your spouse and God, you have the makings of the closest thing there is to a fairytale marriage.
So is ours a fairytale marriage? I think it is as close as it gets.
That gave me chills. Yours is certainly a marriage that I admire, and should I ever marry, I hope that we will treat each other they way I see the two of you act toward one another. It's definitely been a blessing to me to see your marriage!
Posted by: Anna Catherine | March 12, 2013 at 11:40 AM